Cheerleaders: The Evil Lives!

Book Description:

Everybody at Shadyside High remembers when Corky Corcoran destroyed the evil spirit. The evil that attacked the cheerleaders. The evil that killed Sarah Fear one hundred years ago. No-one expected the evil to come back. No-one knew there was only one way to defeat it forever. No-one knew that the answer lay hidden in Sarah Fear's grave. Now the cheerleaders must discover the secret...before it's too late.

My Description:

Part One

 Amanda Roberts is as stiff as a piece of dry spaghetti. Really, she tells us so and that's how we begin this book...this book that will almost certainly dissolve into a heap of stinking doo doo by the time we're done with it. I just get a bad feeling about these Cheerleader books, man. Kick me if I'm wrong! Anyway, Amanda is a senior at Shadyside High and captain of the cheerleading squad which means she'll either be dead or certifiably insane by the end of the book. She's called a Saturday practice and the first couple pages are nothing but the cheerleaders making dirty lustful eyes at the basketball players practicing at the other end of the gym. Two of the guys get into a fight. YAWN.

After practice, Amanda, Victoria, and Janine decide to go to The Corner. Before they leave, Amanda stops to talk to a b-ball player named Judd. Then she turns to see Janine freaking out. She found a little black snake in her gym bag. Two seconds later, a dude named Brandon confesses to putting it there. DEAR GOD I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE BORED. (And I just sat through a three hour astronomy lecture. What did I learn? That I really hate Isaac Newton.) The boys start tossing the defenseless little snake around until Natalie (Brandon is her boyfriend...I think) smacks them in the head with the fact that it's a living thing and she takes it outside.

In the locker room, Amanda finds a duffel bag with a name tag that reads "Corky Corcoran". Inside the bag, she discovers a cheerleading uniform and a photo of five Shadyside cheerleaders. At the bottom of the bag is a small wooden box with a label attached: DO NOT OPEN. EVIL INSIDE. Seriously? No, SERIOUSLY? Is this what the Evil has been reduced to? The disappointment...IT BURNS. She opens the box with the other cheerleaders at The Corner. Inside the box lies a folded letter from Corky along with some other papers. Corky describes the evil that the Evil has wrought. The last line of the letter is "Destroy this box!" I thought Corky drowned the Evil in a toilet or something so how is it now inside this box? Before anyone can look at the other papers, Amanda's raggedy ass boyfriend Dustin interrupts. Amanda doesn't even really like this lump, but he's all over her like white on rice. She only stays with him because he's a basketball player and cheerleaders are destined to be with b-ball players. It's written in the stars or some shit. Anyway, she purposely didn't tell him she was coming here, but he sniffed her out. "I found you." Unfortunately. Dustin gabs on about basketball and Luke and Brandon getting in a fight and then he offers Amanda a ride home because he just assumes it's time for her to leave. She says she drove herself and they walk to the parking lot where she breaks up with him. YES! Dustin goes catatonic, but manages to drive away. YES!

At home, Amanda receives a phone call from a stranger with "a husky voice" so you know it's some kind of creep. "This is the evil spirit, Amanda. I'm alive. I'm coming for you." I wish. WE ALL WISH. But it's just Amanda's friend Keesha. She tells Amanda that Janine has the box and the other papers were instructions for calling the Evil. These idiots decide they'll conjure the spirit with some other cheerleaders the next night. They hang up and Amanda goes down the hall to talk to her sister Adele. Adele is in college now, but she remembers Corky from high school. She tells Amanda about the horrible way Corky's sister Bobbi died and Adele asks Amanda if she's done something to disturb the Evil. Amanda lies and I cries.

The next afternoon, Amanda decides that the box must be destroyed. When she enters the gym for cheer practice, she hears Keesha scream "She's killing her!" Natalie and Janine are beating the shit out of each other which is just so great. The other girls break it up and ask why they were fighting. Natalie's boyfriend (Luke? Brandon? I can't remember and can't be bothered with caring because they all SUCK.) will be playing in a basketball game on Friday while Janine's boyfriend will be bench warming. Apparently Natalie was gloating about it and Janine jumped her. I can't think of a dumber reason for a fight. Practice goes on as usual and at the end, Amanda sees Dustin sitting in the bleachers with an odd look on his face. The kind of look a wolf gets just before it devours a baby bunny's still beating heart.

That evening, Amanda is walking to fellow cheerleader Victoria's house to conjure the evil spirit even though she decided earlier to destroy the freaking box. Evil is gonna get buck wild tonight, kids. Stupid cheerleaders. Before Amanda can get to Victoria's, Dustin pops out of the bushes like a psychotic jack-in-the-box. He wants to "talk". He brings up her crush on Judd and blames that on their break-up and not the fact that he's a nutjob. Amanda ends up running hard to Victoria's house to get away from him. Teenage romance gives me bleeding ulcers.

When Amanda arrives at Victoria's, she's surprised that all the lights are out except for a bunch of black candles. The girls are just preparing to conjure their evil spirit friend which will cast them all into a hell on earth. What, Fear Street not enough for you, hmm? Damn gourd heads. Anyway, Amanda gets really pissed off at the fact that the other girls seem to think it's a big joke. She tells them what Adele told her earlier, but the girls brush it off. The more hysterical Amanda becomes, the funnier they think it is. Of course, in the end, Amanda goes along with them because it's illegal to have a mind of your own. Janine gets the pages with the evil conjuring words and everyone sits in a circle to chant them. A moment later, 2 bright lights flash, the kitchen door bangs open, and a dark figure enters. AIEEE! Never mind...it's just Judd and Brandon. Judd promptly faints like an old lady with vapors. When he wakes up, he says he gets dehydrated after basketball practice. Victoria gives him some orange Gatorade (WHERE'S MY COKE?) while Amanda silently ponders whether it was dehydration or something EVIL that caused Judd to pass out. Personally, I blame his tight little corset.

It is now Friday night and the cheerleaders are at a game. The Shadyside Tigers are playing the Lincoln Hornets. Natalie's boy toy Luke has the ball, but he's not going for the basket. Luke starts to run up the bleacher stairs but trips and slams his head on the edge of a seat. Amanda notices something lying next to him. "The "thing" was the top of Luke's head. His skull. His hair. His scalp--completely torn off." Does this mean the Hornets win?

Part Two

 Four days later, everyone attends Luke's funeral. Afterward, Brandon, Victoria, Keesha, Natalie, Janine, and Amanda hang out at Amanda's house where Natalie accuses Janine of being happy that Luke is dead because now Janine's boyfriend Brandon will get Luke's place on the basketball team. Yes, she IS serious. Natalie runs out of the house and BRANDON of all people decides to go after her. Suspicious? Indeed.

The doorbell rings a few minutes later. It's Judd looking for Brandon. Amanda tells him Brandon isn't there and invites him inside. He goes in and they all talk about Luke some more. Judd tells them they're dedicating Friday night's game to Luke. Soon, all the girls leave and Amanda is conveniently alone with Judd. They kiss and Judd confesses he felt as if he were possessed or something the day Luke died. Amanda thinks it must be the Evil coming through.

After school on Friday, the gym is packed for a pep rally. Janine is depressed about the Natalie situation, but all Natalie is thinking about is the Evil. She wants to tell the principal that they conjured it. WHY? So they can be laughed out of her office? How will that help? The girls start their cheering and afterward, Ms. Oakley (the principal) gives a speech about Luke. Then more cheering. But this time, no-one in the crowd is cheering along. They're all completely losing their shit because Natalie's face and skull are cracking apart, blood pooling at her feet. Everyone flees the gym as the basketball coach covers Natalie's now lifeless body with a piece of canvas. Amanda sees Janine staring down at the body a little too calmly. Automatically, Amanda assumes that Janine is possessed by the Evil and therefore accidentally killed Luke and Natalie. Janine walks over to Amanda and leads her to the locker room. Janine says she's terrified and they really must have brought the Evil back because the tops of heads aren't supposed to pop off and faces shouldn't just crack open like that! The girls think about how they can get rid of the Evil. Amanda remembers that Corky wrote that everything began in the Fear Street Cemetery so they should probably go there...to do stuff...or something. They decide to go now even though it's getting dark and Fear Street sucks even more at night.

The girls stumble through the cemetery searching for Sarah Fear's grave. They soon find it and are shocked to see that the grave has been dug up and the moldy coffin is wide open and empty. DUN DUN DUN! The girls don't have time to examine the grave because they hear someone coming. They run and come face to face with frigging Dustin. He confesses that he followed them here because he's losing more of his mind everyday. Dustin says he wants to talk, but Amanda just wants to leave and says they can talk later. But noooooo. Dustin just stands there so Amanda tries to run around him. She slips and falls into Sarah Fear's stinking grave. She understandably freaks the hell out and attempts to grab Dustin's hand so he can pull her out, but she falls backward and Dustin's face grows smaller and smaller as she falls...and falls...and falls. Somehow.

Part Three

 Amanda swirls through the worm hole at the bottom of the grave until she lands in an old timey town. She immediately spots two girls talking. They refer to each other as Sarah and Jane so Amanda assumes one is Sarah Fear. Sarah rants to her red haired friend Jane about how pissed she is about being forced to marry Thomas Fear and how lucky Jane is to be traveling to London soon. Then Sarah talks about the plan she and Jane recently developed. Since Sarah has never even met Thomas Fear, she's going to send Jane to Shadyside in her place. Jane will pretend to be Sarah, marry Thomas, and the real Sarah can pretend none of this ever happened as she flits gaily through the streets of London (is this during the time of Jack the Ripper?). The two ride off in a carriage while Amanda stays behind to black out. She wakes on a ship that's capsizing in the middle of the ocean. Some girls have all the luck. Sarah is standing at the railing with the other passengers, whining about how she could be on her honeymoon with Thomas Fear rather than facing a watery grave. Amanda and Sarah are thrown overboard and Sarah drowns. Amanda is underwater with her and watches as a green liquid comes spewing out of Sarah's mouth. "It's the Evil!" My friend!

Part Four

 Amanda wakes at the bottom of Sarah Fear's grave. She's soaking wet with Evil water. Dustin drags her out (how long was she gone?) and she tells him and Janine that she travelled back in time. She explains everything including the fact that "Sarah Fear" was actually "Jane Hardy". Janine and Dustin think she's crazy because she was only in the grave for a few seconds. Are they not wondering how she became drenching wet? Janine drives Amanda home and when Amanda gets out of the car, she sees muddy footprints leading to her house. Amanda goes upstairs (she's...HOME ALONE) and hears someone in her bedroom say "Amanda. Come in." She peeks inside and stares at a rotting half corpse, half skeleton thing that goes by the name Sarah Fear. "Come in, Amanda. We must hurry. You and I are going to trade places now." Oh GAWWWWD. Except Amanda just imagined that. She goes into her room where she finds a wet and muddy note from Sarah Fear. "You and your friends have awakened a great Evil. The Evil takes pleasure in killing. You are next, Amanda." Amanda hurries and changes her clothes so she can go to Janine's house because she's the one will all the Evil paperwork. She opens the front door and Judd is standing there with MUDDY SHOES. No! Yes! NOOO! Amanda is instantly convinced the Evil is inside Judd. She flips out and practically shoves him out, saying she's gotta get to Janine's. He offers to drive her and she goes because...she's an idiot? They near Janine's house and see her pulling away in her car with Brandon. Judd follows them and they end up at the cemetery. Amanda leaps out of the car to get away from Judd even though it's probably the other two she needs to worry about. Amanda sees Janine and Brandon near Sarah Fear's grave. She grabs Janine and tells her the Evil is in Judd. He's right behind her when she says it and he's hurt, man, he's real hurt. Amanda changes her mind about Judd when she sees Brandon's eyes glowing bright green. Green is the color of EVIL. Brandon ends up killing Judd and Amanda beats Brandon with a tree branch intil he falls unconscious into the grave. Then Sarah Fear shows up. *sigh* What a circus. Janine and Amanda run, but they turn to look just as Brandon leaps out of the grave and attacks the ragged corpse of Sarah Fear. Amanda realizes that the corpse is Jane and the real Sarah's spirit is in Brandon. The corpse shoves Brandon who grabs Amanda who shoves Brandon who pulls Amanda into the grave with him. (Half of my brain cells just disintegrated.)

Part Five

 Amanda wakes (I feel like I've typed that 500 times) to realize that she's back on that sinking ship. WINNER. This time, Sarah and Jane are there...and Brandon. The two girls are fighting because Sarah is a bitch who possessed anyone she could after she died. They struggle and Jane pulls Sarah overboard. They both drown.

Amanda wakes (AGAIN!) in a hospital where Janine acts completely confused when Amanda mentions the Evil and Luke and Natalie dying. She says Luke and Natalie are fine and she's never heard of a Sarah Fear. Amanda asks to see Brandon who has the same memories as Amanda. Then they both look at each other with glowing green eyes and Amanda says "We can't rest. You and I have so much work to do!" Shit.

Conclusion? NO. If you value any shred of your intelligence, you will not read this book. I repeat, DO NOT READ THIS BOOK. I am absolutely dumber for it.

Next time: "The Babysitter III" I will never understand how there are FOUR of these things...

The Cheerleaders Are Coming For You...

...and they'd already be here if this book I'm reading about them wasn't so damn boring. "Cheerleaders: The Evil Lives!" has got to be the worst of the Cheerleader books and that's saying something. Without Kimmy's crimped black hair, this series is nothing. NOTHING, I tell you! Well, while I'm weeping over my Kimmy shrine (dirty tennis shoes topped with old black Barbie hair) I will also be writing. Almost there. Allllllllmoooossssstt.

happy valentine's day

Seniors #8 - Sweetheart, Evil Heart

Book Description:

Ty Sullivan thinks he's so hot. Especially since he's seeing three girls - all at the same time. And when Ty gets a valentine from the mysterious Amy, he decides to go out with her, too. But Amy isn't like the other girls... She's dead.

My Description:

We begin this tale of heartache and woe with Ty Sullivan bragging to his friend Mickey about what a stud he is. "I'm telling you, Mickey. I'm a wanted man." If you've read the other Seniors recaps on this here blog, you know that I loathe Ty Sullivan with the fiery heat of a thousand equatorial suns. Honestly, I can't remember why (I think it's mostly that he's a smug arrogant turd) but that doesn't matter. The hatred LIVES! Anyway, Ty is a jackass who is dating Phoebe Yamura, Trisha Conrad, and Marla Newman, all three of whom need their asses kicked to a pulp for letting this idiot manipulate them. (I'm not even on the third page and I'm already slamming my face into the wall. This one's gonna be a heartbreaker, kids.) Ty thinks about his gorgeous girlfriends and how awesome he is. This guy is in complete ORGASM over himself. "I am definitely at the top of Shadyside High's most wanted list." Kiss my white ass, Ty. Mickey tells Ty to watch out because Trisha already has a boyfriend, Gary Fresno, and he's a real badass. You can tell because he fights a lot and wears lots of leather and tight, scrotum-crushing jeans (I assume). Marla shows up a moment later so Ty hangs up on Mickey, checks out his hot bod (YACK!) in the mirror, and runs downstairs to meet Marla. They head up to the attic to "study". That's his idea of a date. Making out in a musty attic while his 11 year old sister is a room away. Seriously, I hate you, Ty. He rakes the 500 layers of dust off an old loveseat while Marla conveniently loses her balance and bumps into an old desk, knocking out an old valentine that's been waiting for this moment for years. Ty picks up the heart shaped card and reads the note inside.

Dearest Tyler,
I've been waiting so long for you. I ache for your kiss. Write to me or I will die. Bring your letter to the Shadyside Cemetery and leave it under the old elm tree near the Fear family tombstones.
Love, Amy

This chick is way dramatic. Ty assumes this was written to his great grandfather a long time ago because his grampy's name was Tyler. Ty thinks Amy sounds hot. WHAT ABOUT THAT LETTER WAS HOT? Marla decides to leave after giving Ty a "long, sizzling kiss". She also mentions that the Valentine's Dance is going to be at a craptacular club called Red Heat this year, but Ty doesn't really say anything because he has three girlfriends and can't exactly take them all. After Marla leaves, Ty fingers the valentine until the doorbell rings. It's Phoebe and she's curious as to why she just saw Marla driving away. He says she dropped off some biology notes (and her sloppy tongue). Phoebe buys it and the two have a Coke while Phoebe reads the ULTRA HOT valentine. Then they make out and Ty thinks about Amy the whole time. He seems to think the valentine is actually for HIM. How would anyone have gotten it into a desk in his attic? If it's a recent delivery, why does the thing look as old as Methuselah? But Ty doesn't give a damn about pesky logical questions. He just wants his woman. "Whoever she was, she sounded like a real babe." Define 'real babe'. Because I don't understand how you're getting that, sir.

A few days later, Ty is driving Trisha home in his kick ass Celica. They're just coming off a date on the Conononka River. Can you feel the romance? Me neither. Trisha brings up the Valentine's Dance, but Ty says they shouldn't go because it could cause trouble. Then Trisha says she recently had one of her famous visions. In this one, someone from the past was chasing her and Ty. He asks if the person's name was Amy, but Trisha couldn't see who it was and now she's all suspicious about who this AMY person is. If you only knew...that Amy is the least of your problems. Ty tells her about the letter and says he actually wrote back and put the letter in the cemetery for Amy. "Just as a goof, I guess." You guessed wrong. Amy is forgotten a moment later when Trisha realizes Gary is following them. Ty makes some twisty turns and loses the stalker, but not for long. At the next stop light, Gary pulls up behind them, jumps out of his car, and starts pounding on Trisha's window and screaming at her to get out of the car. Ty gets out and tells Gary to get lost and he does, but only because another car has pulled up and is honking its horn because stupid teenagers clogging traffic with their fighting and dirty love triangles are so annoying. Oh, but wait! Gary was only PRETENDING to walk away. He turns back and shoves Ty against the car before telling him "You'll pay for this." Two guys from the traffic piling up come and grab Gary before he can really mess Ty up. Trisha ends up leaving with Gary and Ty rushes home to eat before going to Marla's. He's received a letter from Amy, sent through the mail this time rather than the magical dusty desk portal.

Dearest Ty,
I knew you would come. I knew you were my soul mate. Nothing can separate us now. Not even a hundred years. Please bring me another note.
Love, Amy



The next day at school, Ty is messing around in the hall with his friends. They seem to enjoy talking about the fact that Ty might get caught with one girlfriend by another girlfriend. They're quite jealous of their jerky little friend. Ty spots Gary at the end of the hall. Gary gives him an evil look and mouths "You're a dead man." Yay for death threats! Ty's friends warn him to stay away from Trisha for the sake of his health. Then they run off because they don't want to be seen with a doomed bilge rat.

Ty hangs out at his house with Phoebe after school because he's afraid someone will see them together. Phoebe points out the newest decaying letter from Amy and they read it together.

Beloved Ty,

Your notes keep me alive, even though we're separated by so much time. I shall always be true to you, my dearest. Are you being true to me? I am ashamed to confess that I have a terrible, jealous temper!

Love, Amy

This should work out well for you, Ty. Phoebe thinks it's someone playing a joke (as any reasonable person would assume) but Ty doesn't believe it. Too much lovin' makes you an idiot. The two loveworms start kissing but are interrupted by the phone. Ty answers, but there's too much static to hear anyone so he hangs up. The phone rings again, Ty answers again, and when a voice says "It's Amy...Amy. Ty, can you hear me?", he hangs up. Phoebe leaves a moment later and Ty is left alone to think of Amy and the fact that she might be a wee pissed off if she knew about his other girlfriends. This is the closest he'll ever get to guilt.

That evening, Gary is driving Trisha home and wondering why she had to go around with Ty Sullivan. He thinks it's because he (Gary) is too poor for rich Trisha, but she denies it. Gary drives like a maniac, scaring Trisha until she finally screams that she'll never see Ty again. Trisha manages to make it home in one piece and finds a nice surprise waiting - a valentine that says "Stay away from Ty. He's all mine now." He's all yours, sister! Trisha has a vision of some guy with a bloody head wound and she knows it's either Ty or Gary. Someone is gonna die. Eventually. Probably. Hopefully.

At lunch the next day, Trisha tells Dana Palmer about her vision and they talk about Ty and Gary who Dana declares dangerous. Or dangerously stupid. After school, Trisha drives to Gary's house in the shitty part of town. She finds him in his garage and she warns him about her vision. He brushes it off by saying she'd like to see him dead because he's not good enough. Then he grabs her and says he'll make sure it's Ty she saw in that vision. Dammit, Gary, SHUT UP.

That night, Trisha goes to Waynesbridge with Ty. Because everyone in this book is a foolish twit. She tells him about her vision and Gary's reaction. Then she mentions the valentine and shows it to him. He freaks out because it's Amy's handwriting. After the two see a movie, they come out of the theater to find all four tires on Ty's car completely flat and a bloody dead rabbit with a knife sticking out of its chest in the back seat. Ty is furious because he believes Gary did it. "If Gary thinks he can scare me off, he's totally wrong. I'll get him for this!" Liar.

Ty calls a cab for Trisha and a tow truck for himself. After he gets his tires changed, he drives to Gary's place to get revenge for something he's not even sure the guy did. Ty accuses Gary, Gary punches Ty in the face because he didn't touch Ty's stinking car, and Ty leaves. The whole thing is over in about two seconds. Ty goes home to find a new note from Amy. "I warned you about my jealous temper." It's written on the back of a photo of Amy. She's wearing a cloak and bonnet and some emo sad eyes. Ty realizes Amy trashed his car and thinks NOW would be a good time to end the letter writing because this dead girl is getting crazy. So he writes her to tell her not to bother writing anymore because things are getting too intense and he's too much of a wuss to handle it.

At school the next day, Ty finds a note in his locker. A note written in thick, dripping blood. "You're dead. Love, Amy" She has a way with words...and blood. After school, Ty runs into Phoebe in the student parking lot and they make a date for later, assuming Ty is still alive later. Ty goes home to find yet another letter, this one informing him that his cruelty is unforgivable and his girlfriends will have to die along with him. Ty decides to write her in an effort to save his worthless ass. He apologizes and says it would be better if they stayed apart. But Ty can't resist being an asshole and ends the letter with "And please leave us alone." It's signed "Good luck, Ty" Good luck? She's dead, moron. I think that's a pretty good sign that her luck ran out a long time ago.

A little later, Phoebe comes over and they do that thing they do. Until they're interrupted by Marla who claims someone just tried to kill her. Ty doesn't care. He's more worried about making sure that Phoebe knows that Marla is only here for her biology notes, nothing else, nothing touchy or tongue-y.

The next day, Ty tries to convince himself that Marla was attacked by a girl gang. No comment. Absolutely NO comment. But Ty gets a slap in the face when Marla shows him the note she received. "I may be dead - but you are next to die. Stay away from him." In the cafeteria at lunch, he sees Phoebe who shows him her own note from Amy. "He's mine, not yours. I'll make sure you can't have him. Because you'll be dead - like me." Later, Trisha also shows him a note from Amy. "I warned you, but you didn't listen. You didn't stay away from him. You will pay - and join me with the dead." Trisha wants to know why Marla and Phoebe also got notes and Ty tells her it's all just a dumb joke and she believes it.

A few days later, Ty calls Trisha to ask if she wants to go to the dance with him, but she's decided to go with Gary. Then he calls Phoebe who tells him she can't go because she twisted her ankle at cheerleading practice. Ty thinks she's lying because she's afraid of dying and he hangs up to call Marla. She can't go because she's supposedly going to her grandma's birthday party that night. Ty is alone and oh how he regrets it.

It's now Saturday night and Ty has just showed up at Red Heat for the dance. Across the packed room, he spots a weirdo in a bonnet. Looks like Amy tracked him down. Old dead chicks have noses like bloodhounds...and Ty sure does stink. Amy vanishes before Ty can speak to her. Then he sees her standing near the balcony staring at him. He runs up the stairs, but the moment he reaches the top, Amy is back downstairs. Really? Are we really playing this game? I feel like I just stepped into some stupid Abbott and Costello movie. When Ty finally catches up to her, she attempts to kill him by throwing him over the balcony, but before that can happen, Ty pulls off her bonnet...and sees Phoebe. Then two more bonnet girls appear. Marla, Trisha, and Phoebe pulled this prank to get back at Ty for screwing them all over. All the letters were written by them. Ty feels like a total ass for believing that a dead girl was stalking him. He makes his way toward the door and spots ANOTHER bonnet girl. She slips out the door and Ty chases her.

Meanwhile, Trisha, Marla, and Phoebe are feeling a little guilty over crushing Ty and psychologically scarring him for life. Girls, your guilt is tainting my joy at seeing Ty practically cry and wet himself so kindly cut the shit. As they're talking, they realize that none of them planted the dead bunny or slashed the tires. They just figure some creeps from Waynesbridge did it for no apparent reason. They head to the parking lot to search for Ty. They find his bleeding body at the edge of the road. "Ty Sullivan was dead." WHAAAAAT?

Later, the police inform them that Ty was hit by a car. The girls feel horribly guilty as they talk to the detectives. They tell them about the joke, but the detectives don't find it funny, especially since one of the valentines was found in Ty's pocket. The detectives want to keep them for more questioning and the girls are terrified that they'll be blamed for Ty's death.

Trisha gets home a few hours later where she has a vision. In this one, she sees Ty running and calling Amy's name. Then he's slammed by a car which just keeps going after it hits him. Trisha decides to call Gary just to make sure he didn't murder Ty, but he never answers the phone. GUILTY!

On Monday, the halls of Shadyside High are filled with talk of Ty's death. Trisha can't stop thinking of her vision and who could have possibly killed Ty. She sees Gary and he gets pissed because she's still thinking about Ty even though he's now a dead man, but he quickly apologizes. He says he wants to show her something and leads her outside to the parking lot. It's a new red car...the same color as the car Trisha saw plowing over Ty. And it has a dent in it. Perhaps made by the fleshy body of a 17 year old creep? Gary says he "borrowed" the car and wants to take her for a drive, but she refuses and runs away. She runs all the way to the cemetery and finds Justin Thompson (resident nerd) there as well. Justin is acting very strange. He offers to walk Trisha home, but she declines and he says "I like you...a lot. I bet you didn't know that." It wouldn't be so odd if he wasn't trying to moisten his desert dry lips the entire time. When Trisha doesn't give in to his parched passion, he says she should be grateful to him for getting rid of Ty for her. "I had to kill him, Trisha. I did it for you, don't you get it?" Uh, no, no-one "gets it", oh crazy bespectacled one.

Trisha flees but trips and falls which gives Justin the opportunity to grab her by the throat and start to choke her. She pokes him in the eyes, he lets her go, and promptly trips, cracking his skull against a gravestone. Justin died because he was a clumsy nerd. I now fear for my own life more than ever.

After school on Wednesday, a memorial service is held for Ty. I guess they just dumped Justin's murdering ass in a shallow hole in the woods. They probably let a roving pack of feral dogs dig his grave. Trisha goes home afterward and finds an apologetic note from Gary. Trisha loves him again since she's sure he's not a murdering psycho. Gary "spontaneously" rides up on a blue mountain bike, the ride of choice for all badasses who desperately want to look less like hit-and-run killers. Gary ends up telling her that Justin loaned his car to him on the day that he died. Very useless information, boo boo.

On Friday afternoon, Trisha and Phoebe are walking home together. Phoebe wants to take a shortcut through the cemetery where Trisha nearly met her maker. They pass the headstone that Justin fell upon and Trisha is shocked to see the name on it: Amy Fear 1872 - 1890. The End...or is it? (No it isn't. This is Fear Street, after all.)

Conclusion? That ending is just VOMITOUS.

Next time: "Cheerleaders: The Evil Lives!" These damn cheerleaders are back to end the EVIL! for good.